Thursday, May 31, 2018

Men Without Women : Book Review


Earlier this year I had read, Kafka on the Shore, by Haruki Murakami. (Read review here) It was the first time I had read a book by this author. While I had enjoyed reading it, I hadn't fully understood it. So I picked up this collection of 7 short stories titled, Men Without Women, by the same author with trepidation. I knew beforehand, that I will not be fully able to grasp everything, but I took the plunge anyways. I have reached a conclusion that Murakami's writings might enlighten you few times, but mostly they leave you feeling incomplete, incompetent and irritated. But as you try to find answers, you get addicted. Addicted in a bad way, like mind altering substance abuse! I must still confess, that some stories in this collection were highly accessible and enjoyable. 

As the title suggests, each of the seven stories, is about lonely men. Loneliness which may not necessary stem from lack of the company of women. Each story also has some twisted or broken relationship between a man and a woman. While in Kafka on the Shore, there were undercurrents of  Oedipal Complex and Incest, this collection of stories rely heavily on cuckolded men, promiscuity, sadism, fetish etc. But mind it, the stories are not actually about these issues. They are just triggers for a protagonist's journey or for his or her search for answers. The stories are about the emotions or lack of them that emerge out of these triggers. 

The first story, Drive My Car,  is a pleasantly accessible story. The main act in this story is a conversation between Kafuku (a middle aged actor and a widower) and Misaki (a young adroit female driver, he has recently hired and who rarely speaks). During that conversation Kafuku talks about his now dead wife and a question that bothers him. He also talks about a co-actor of his wife whom he befriended after her death. At the end, the usually reticent Misaki says something, that is simple and profound at the same time, which provides a sense of closure both to the reader and Kafuku. For me that is a great reward in a short story. 

A line that stayed back with me from this story - "There's no logic involved. All I can do is accept what they did and try to get on with my life."

Yesterday, is the title of the second story. It was surprisingly underwhelming and felt incomplete. But not incomplete in the sense of wanting more of it. By now a pattern also emerges in the stories. These are stories about men who may not be with women at this point of time, but their presence still looms large in their lives. Also Murakami isn't going for a conclusion or resolution by the end of the story. He just stops at a point, where some resonance happens or a reconciliation appears. This is a story about two boys in their twenties - Kitaru and Tanimura and Kitaru's girlfriend Erik. The story itself is about how Kitaru finds it difficult to take his relationship with Erik to next level and how it impacts others. This simple short, for a non-Japanese like me, gives me an insight into how the haves and have nots are divided in their society. It highlights how your dialect and address can impact your social stature.  

I don't want to give any spoilers, but a quote from the story really resonated with me - "As time passes, memory, inevitably, reconstitutes itself."

One of the weakest stories in the collection, An Independent Organ, has a very laborious narration to make a point which sounds profound but is really not. The story is about a cosmetic surgeon Dr. Tokai who is in his 50s, never married, but is highly promiscuous. So in physical sense he is never without a woman. He finally falls in love at the ripe age and also experiences his first betrayal, which leads him to question his being - "Who am I?"

Despite its obvious trappings, I really like the following extract from the book. It is such a cliche though. "With something like that (love) there's  no such thing as too soon or too late, I told him. Your understanding may have, come a little late in life, but that's better than never realizing it at all."

Scheherzade is highly enjoyable and intriguing account of love. It may be because in this story the male view point of Habara is limited. As a reader, we don't even know who really Habara is and why is he confined to his home or whether it is really his home or why he can't go out. It doesn't matter after a certain point in the story. Because that is not what this story is about. The story is also about Habara's nurse or house-help whose real name is never told, but Habara in his own mind has named her Scheherzade. He names her so because, she narrates strange stories to Habara every time she sleeps with him. The story of her almost debilitating, teenage crush on a boy in her class is told like a thriller. The thrill of doing something taboo is so palpable in this sad account of one sided love. Is Murakami indicating here, that though her love was never reciprocated and she married someone else, but the memories of her early years never make her feel lonely? That she will never be a Woman without Men! The last story she narrates is left unfinished and here I wanted it more. My curiosity kills me here, but no answers are revealed. 

It is in the fifth story, Kino, where Murakami gets surreal. The elements like snakes, rain (and metaphors thereof) and cats make appearance, that reminded me of Kafka on the Shore. Almost till the end I thought I understood everything about this story. The story of a bartender who is going through a divorce. But by the end I lost it. Or may be I think I lost it. Because the core thought of confronting your inner hurt and pain stayed back with me. If you don't confront your inner feelings, they will gnaw at you.

"But there are times in this world when it's not enough just not to do the wrong thing,"a character in this story says so aptly. 

Samsa in Love does it for me. This is the story I loved the most. This is the story which will make me read more of Murakami. A bug turns into a human. It doesn't enjoy being one. It falls in love and it doesn't want to be anything but human. By now I realize that loneliness is not necessarily physical absence of someone.

He thinks to himself , "Yet had he been a fish or sunflower, and not a human being, he might never have experienced this emotion."

The last story, Men without Women, is the story which gives the book its title. Here the narrator is not actually lonely. He has a wife, about whom we don't come to know anything. We also don't know about how is their marriage. It might be actually a happy one. One night he receives a call about the news of the death of one of his earlier lovers. That makes him feel lonely There is lot of rumination after that. Many metaphors are used to drive home the point that she was the kind of love, everyone looks for. But I didn't connect with those allegories at all. I thought this one didn't require more than a page, but the author says this story in about 15 of them.

I also didn't connect with the central thought of this one - "That's what it's like to lose a woman. And at a certain time, losing one woman means losing all women."

Yes! There are few rewarding moments and stories in this one. As I said earlier, the highs are addictive and thus those lows really leave you vacant. Just like I have heard drugs do!!!

Monday, May 21, 2018

Book Review: A Whole New Mind

After a long time, I picked up a book in the genre loosely termed as management / self-help books. My experience with this genre in past has been less than satisfying, mostly. This book, which is pompously titled - A Whole New Mind: Why Right-Brainers will rule the future - is also less than a satisfying read. 

The author, Daniel H. Pink, tries to hammer in the fact that jobs moving to Asia, Abundance and Automation have created a scenario in America (or developed countries) where Right Brained jobs will become more lucrative and R - Directed Thinking will become a desired skill. And he reproduces this fact in thousands of ways in his book. If I am that bad a reader, that I need same thing to be repeated for me so many times, I really don't deserve to understand this simple postulation.

After introducing the reasons for Right Brainers ruling the future, the author explains the six senses / tools that are required to develop or nurture R - Directed Thinking. (R - Directed Thinking doesn't mean that left side of the brain is not required. It just means that senses which are dominantly right brained will have to play a larger role) These six senses are - Design, Story, Symphony, Empathy, Play, and Meaning. These six senses put together highlight the importance of creativity and innovation as key business differentiators. 

No doubt that the author brings to fore an important change happening as of today, but as an Indian reader, I found the book lacking in several aspects. The book divides the world between developed countries and Asia. So L - Directed thinking jobs moving to Asia (including India), is one of the key reasons, why Americans should incorporate R - Directed thinking in their armor. As a reader, while I can apply the lessons in India specific scenarios as well, the book essentially alienates Asian readers. There is no effort to discuss what these changes mean for Asians. It feels like the issue at hand is not that hot for knowledge workers here in India.

Each chapter on the six senses, is followed by a portfolio of resources, which one can use or visit, to sharpen these senses. This feature is excellent, but I so wished, that the author had kept in mind an Asian context here as well. Indians have a particular way of learning things and sharpening their skills. By focusing on US context here the author misses the fact that some senses / values like Meaning and Empathy are deeply ingrained in our culture. Story-telling is also a key skill which Indian leaders have used since ages. Indian leaders, in my experience, generally have R-directed thinking. I hope in the next edition, author takes this diversity of work cultures and leadership styles into account.

While the set up for the need of R - Directed thinking is done beautifully, I felt there were not enough examples or compelling cases shared in the book, which make it evident how people are really nurturing these senses at their workplaces. May be the book was only meant to scratch the surface so that Pink gets lot of consulting assignments to really reveal the nuts and bolts of the subject at hand.

Out of the six senses, I felt that in the chapters on Meaning and Play, I found things which were great thought starters. These two chapters made this book worthy of an average rating. 

Friday, May 04, 2018

Milestones - Post No. 100

Milestones are exciting. And the number 100 is super exciting. This is my hundredth post on this blog and I thought it is a great opportunity to write about milestones in general and this blog in particular. 

When we are watching a cricket match, and the batsman goes from the score of 99 to 100, there is this infectious celebration, that spreads the cheer all around. If we look at this objectively, it is just addition of one run. Just the way the batsman went from 98 to 99 runs, he went from 99 to 100. In the context of the match, most probably the contribution of this additional run is immaterial. But a batsman who mostly gets out in 90s is less celebrated than the one who mostly gets out at 100 or more. Their strike rates, averages, and all other parameters might be exactly the same. But one has scored more centuries than the other. 

Who really decides, what is a milestone? Or is it just a mathematical thing, as one moves from 2 digits to 3 digits? But then in cricket, even 50 is a milestone score.

Let us look at something personal. Marriage anniversaries! I have been married for more than 9 years. In November this year, I will be celebrating my 10th anniversary. 1st, 10th, 25th and 50th wedding anniversaries are considered important milestones in a married couple's life. But then for me, the 9th one was equally a happy moment and so would be the 24th one. In cricket, higher the score, more physically drained you are. So scoring a 100 is a physical achievement as well. But in marriage the more number of years you are married, more comfortable you become with your partner. It is in the initial years, when you discover many new things about each other and you make difficult choices and changes to ensure your marriage works. So shouldn't the first few anniversaries be celebrated more than the later ones?

But then may be milestones are there to remind you that one should not stop putting efforts. 

I believe milestones should be celebrated because of the following reasons:
  • Celebration of a milestone is not about the point you have reached. It is the celebration of the journey to that point, the struggles on the way and the lessons learned. It is the point of celebration as well as reflection.
  • Celebration of a milestone, also is an opportunity to savor the moment and gather your energies to move to the next milestone with even more vigor and enthusiasm.
  • There are certain milestones in life, which help you reach closer to the ultimate goal of your life. Like if you want to retire early in life, then lot of milestones have to be hit faster than usual. So milestones should be celebrated because they take you closer to your life's ultimate goal.
  • Nothing in life is possible without others. As you reach any milestone in life, there are people who have supported you to reach there. Celebration of a milestone is also a moment to thank those who were there with you in the journey.
This 100th post is a personal milestone, but not towards any ultimate goal. I like writing. I am happy that I was able to write these many posts. I had recently written about my reasons for writing and about the title of my blog, Free Spirit. Here are few nuggets of information about my blog. These help me reflect on this milestone better. 
  • My first post on this blog was on April 27, 2005. It was about my travel in Delhi Metro. It took me a little over 13 years to write 100 posts. But that is not the complete story. 
  • I didn't write a single post in years 2009, 2010, 2011, 2013, 2014 and 2015. I am sure I have many excuses for this. But I feel in these 6 vacant years, I pursued something else which didn't give me as much happiness as writing gives.
  • Out of the 100 posts including this one, I had written only 18 posts till 2015. Even if I exclude the 6 years when I didn't write anything, it is still just 2.2 posts a year on an average. Pathetic number, given the fact that I have so much to say.
  • In 2016, I wrote 15 posts, with each post having 3 short stories. I was part of a group, where one had to write something around the "Word of the Day". I had actually written hundreds of such really short stories in 2016, but published only 45 out of them. But thanks to this group, I started writing again. Also I think I had improved, a little, as a writer.
  • In 2017, I wrote 35 posts, largely due to my participation in A-Z Challenge. I wrote 26 posts in April 2017 and 9 posts in rest of the year. But this challenge has helped me write regularly since then. 
  • In 2018, so far I have written 32 posts (including the one you are reading). I wrote 26 posts in April 2018 as well as part of the A-Z Challenge again. I am sure this is going to be my best year in terms of number of posts. 
So a big thanks to the group (Owlery) I had joined in 2016 and the fellow bloggers, who motivated me to take up the A-Z Challenge. Let us now look at some numbers, which give me insights about my readers over last 13 years.
  • Most of the page views on my blog are from United States, followed by India. That is a surprise. Seemingly, I am writing things about India, which are unique for people in US. 
  • The top 10 countries on my blog as per page views are US, India, Canada, Germany, Russia, Poland, France, UK, Singapore and UAE, in the same order. Australia and South America are big misses. I need to read blogs from those countries and find out why. 
  • 52% of my readers are Windows users, 16 % are iPhone OS users and 14% are Android users. In last 2 years, % of iPhone OS users is going up. Clearly rich people among my readers are going up. 🤣
  • My top 10 posts by readership so far are listed below. 5 are from 2017, 4 from 2018 and 1 is from 2007. As I have written more posts recently, the skew is because of obvious reasons. Also I didn't really use to share my earlier posts with anyone as I felt that I would be judged. Now, I write for pleasure and don't seek anyone's approval. Now I feel confident of sharing, what I write. I thank all my readers for sparing their time and sharing their feedback with me. 
I am sure, with encouragement from you all, I will write the next 100 posts at a better pace.